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Stop The Squirrels logoSTOP THE SQUIRRELS.org · Dexter’s campaign
🚨 BREAKING: Squirrel spotted on the back fence at 7:42 AMTail flick detected in Dexter’s directionBarking duration: 14 minutesAcorn theft confirmedDexter demands a treat for his troubles🚨 BREAKING: Squirrel spotted on the back fence at 7:42 AMTail flick detected in Dexter’s directionBarking duration: 14 minutesAcorn theft confirmedDexter demands a treat for his troubles
Official campaign of Dexter the Chihuahua

Stop the Squirrels!

One small chihuahua. One big problem. Zero tolerance for tail-flicking, acorn-hoarding and fence-top taunting.

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Dexter the chihuahua investigating a laptop
Dexter, President & Chief Barking Officer, researching the squirrel menace. (He found the internet.)
A squirrel sticking its tongue out
The numbers don’t lie

Squirrel incidents this week

0Fence-top taunts
0Acorns stolen
0Tail flicks (in Dexter’s direction)
0Treats needed to recover

Statistics compiled by Dexter. Accuracy not guaranteed. Dexter can’t count past 3, but he feels strongly about these numbers.

The menace

Why we must stop the squirrels

The Fence-Top Taunt

Every morning. Same fence. Same smug little face. They KNOW Dexter can’t climb. It’s a power move, and it is not okay.

The Acorn Heist

Dexter found one acorn. ONE. It was taken by a squirrel before he could even sniff it. We demand justice (and the acorn).

Reckless Tail Flicking

That fluffy tail goes flick, flick, flick. It is basically a tiny flag of victory. Dexter has asked them to stop. They have not.

The plan

Dexter’s 3-step action plan

1

Bark

Sound the alarm. A short, sharp, high-pitched bark lets every squirrel in the neighborhood know someone is watching.

2

Bark Louder

If the squirrel is still there, escalate. This is the most important step. Dexter is very, very good at this step.

3

Treats

Recovery. After a hard day of defending the yard, every hero deserves a snack. Preferably bacon-flavored.

★ REWARD OFFERED ★

WANTED

Wanted squirrel

Nutzo “Fluffy Tail” McGee

  • Crimes: taunting, acorn theft, smirking
  • Last seen: the back fence, laughing
  • Armed with: a very fluffy tail
REWARD: One (1) belly rub
Train with Dexter

Whack-a-Squirrel

Think you have what it takes? Click the squirrels before they escape. You have 30 seconds. Dexter believes in you.

Score: 0Time: 30sBest: 0

Testimonials

What the neighborhood is saying

“I have never been so afraid of a dog that weighs six pounds.”

— A Very Nervous Pigeon

“Dexter’s barking changed my life. Also, I now cannot sleep.”

— Biscuit the Beagle (next door)

“I remain neutral. But the treats look delicious.”

— Mr. Whiskers, cat (non-voting member)

Ready to stand up to the squirrels?

Join Dexter’s army today. Membership is free, and the pledge only requires a little barking.

Sign Me Up!